Hello Human

Learning that all mankind is human, Providence has taken to calling us just that. It's made for some comical sentences, like at church when she said "Mom, did you see that human help me?" While glad that she can tell the difference between human and non using the word to describe those around us sounds so mechanical but it makes me laugh every time.

Another thing that made me laugh was when we pulled out Dairy of a Fly by Doreen Cronin to read from our library bag. Chanting the title while we settled down Providence as usual wanted to "read" the title once more before I opened it and slowly said "Diarrhea of a Fly" I busted up, no wonder she was so excited to begin reading.

On another note, in church she bit herself when I told her she needed to be quiet. She did it again later in the day, and it rather disturbs me. It's not the first time she's inflicted injury on herself purposefully. There is a girl she looks up to and adores that bonks her head to be silly or when she's made a mistake or is embarrassed. Providence now does the same thing. Is this something to ignore, or talk about? I am extremely uncomfortable with it and have told Providence that we should not purposefully harm our bodies. We are after all a temple of the Lord and should be caring for our bodies as such right?

Boys and Girls

I am totally having writers block with the Friday Letters, I know what I want to say, at leas how it feels, it just isn't getting from my mind into something readable. So instead of staring at a blank page trying to pry words from my mind I will take a purposeful break this Friday in lieu of spending all day thinking that I need to get something down.

I decided this when my daughter innocently told me that Snow White hates Sponge Bob (apparently a very wicked sponge) but didn't know how to kill him, still quietly musing about it her face suddenly lit up considerably and she exclaimed "I know she can get a gun!" Her infrequent "let's kill it" attitude, like growling out "I'm a Princess Captain, and NEVER nice." has perhaps given me a small glimpse of what you mothers with boys go through daily, fighting, killing and mayhem. Don't get me wrong I can sword fight with the best of them*. I also can make killer lego rifles, and can make explosion sounds with my mouth. I just like being able to have tea parties, watch my daughter "nurse" her baby, and play pretty dress-up too. There's a reason boys and girls are different, and yes they are different no matter how similar you try to make them.

*Disclaimer: I can sword fight with the best of them - that is a blatant lie, I cannot sword fight with the best of sword fighters, I can however turn miscellaneous household objects into swords and swing them around while enjoying myself.

It's Official

September 2004 - September 2005 - September 2006 - September 2007



September 2008

We are officially working on year five now.

A 4th Birthday Party

The party went fantastically, even with the torrential downpour, if I do say so myself. Unfortunately I didn't take many pictures, in fact I didn't take any pictures. Kelsey kindly did take some, though when I was looking through the ones taken I found more of her children then anything else (I don't blame you too much, first of all I wasn't clear that I wanted you to take pictures and secondly we all know your kids are pretty darn cute). So back to the party- for those unaware we had a Helen Keller party. Providence, who thinks Helen Keller is amazing and will often pretend to be her, has been requesting a Helen Keller party for ages (that's about 6 months to a 3 year old). Having never been to a Helen Keller party we had to get a little creative, I did rule out putting blindfolds and earplugs on all children as they entered pretty early on. The end result of my deliberations was losing one sense at a time. First sight: we did that with a game, I put some common objects in a couple of boxes and cut a hole to put your hand in to guess what the objects were by feeling alone. Next hearing: which I didn't actually try to take away, instead we all learned to sign the song "Happy Birthday" while we sang. We also had cupcakes to decorate, and rooms to play in. I had a great time and hope that everyone else who attended enjoyed it as much as I did.

After the party it was very much necessary to parade some of the new fashions acquired. And then just as necessary to parade around naked in the rain.

Meth Project

Since living here in Idaho there are somethings that I have had to get used to that are quite different from my Santa Cruz, CA hometown. One of them has been billboards. In Santa Cruz county I believe there is just one, yes one in the whole county. Here however you see them every few feet, not even limited to the highway but they're on main city streets too. These lovely works of art *does my sarcasm show through?* have caused many conversations with my little one, but by far the most memorable was caused by this kindly informative series:I have always felt that honesty is the best policy when it comes to telling children things but I also believe that an honest answer to a three year old may be different (in how much is told) then an honest answer to a thirteen year old. Thrown completely off guard with Providence's questions when she had her first meeting with the girl-in-the-hospital billboard I unfortunately answered the questions to a thirteen year old. I pretty much I gave her my entire, albeit limited, knowledge of the drug.

Now I didn't wake up one day thinking that I would need to have a drug talk with my three year old, I had not planned a drug talk, so I spewed forth more information then I would have preferred had I actually had a chance to think about it beforehand.

Providence is strangely fascinated with the girl in the hospital, she hopes to see her every time we go out and will excitedly point out the "drug girl" as we drive by. After that fateful day of questioning every time she played doctor it was to take care of the drug girl. If she wanted me to be the doctor she would tell me that she has been doing crystal meth, um yes rather disturbing from a three year old but I was at a complete loss as to how to turn this into something redeeming.

One day my brother Aaron heard her new game and talked with me about it, after our conversation I asked him to talk with Providence. He told her that drugs are very serious and not something to joke about, and that we shouldn't "play" doing drugs. She stopped pretending to do crystal meth, though she still does get excited when we approach the billboard and talks about her (the drug-girl) often.

I learned a valuable lesson too, if I have not thought about a subject it's ok to keep silent and tell Providence I will think about her questions before answering.

To see or read more about the Meth Project visit Idaho Meth Project

Sometimes They Need Some Fun Too

Ever wondered what a "book picnic" looked like. Providence was kind enough to demonstrate.

A Day Late And A Dollar Short

This past week was dreadful, I mean there were bright patches throughout and it certainly ended remarkably better then it began, but it was still a hard week. One of the hardships was losing a library movie, now don't laugh, it was very distressing to me. I hate misplacing things and misplacing things that don't belong to me is really up there on my stress-o-meter, that combined with a few other misplaced items, oh yeah and the constant whining of my daughter, a broken vacuum cleaner and just feeling out of sorts made for a rocky week.

Towards the end it did start start to smooth out. The vacuum wasn't really broken, just clogged, Saturday a number of men from my church came over and installed sprinklers, then that evening we spent an enjoyable dinner at a friends home. Plus I ended up making it a point to try to enjoy my daughters company more. It can get hard sometimes when it's just the two of us day in and day out, and yes sometimes I need to force myself to enjoy her.

This week we seem to be doing better, I feel like I have more to give, and therefore can handle more. Which strangely makes there less to handle. Yesterday I decided to just pay the lost fine at the library while I was there, even though it wasn't technically due till today. I had searched my entire house and car and felt like there was a weight hanging on me, a shadow over my head, I wanted it released.

Well guess what Providence found 1 hour after returning home?

Years Past: Part V

While living in Hawaii I met some really good friends. With the military you make fast and often lifelong friends, in fact meeting and befriending those who you may otherwise not (in your typical civilian setting), is a normal occurrence.

One of Joe's friends had gotten married about a year after we did so when he brought his lovely bride to live in Hawaii we naturally became quick friends, especially when we found out we were expecting within two weeks of each other. Though there may have been some hardships (like the four of us living together for a month and the two women fairly newly pregnant...and it's not a good combination if you're wondering) we pushed passed it since with both of our husbands deployed for last bits of pregnancy and the births of our children we ended up spending alot of time together.

We did, both of us, have family coming out for the births of our children so we wouldn't be all alone, of course babies don't really care about waiting for people.

So when she called me in the middle of the night a little over three weeks before her due date saying she thought her water may have broken, I told her I'd be over in a minute to take her to the hospital (which is where she was planning her birth). Ah, the days before kids, I literally could be over in a minute, I just rolled out of bed and pulled on some clothes.

Once at the hospital we found that her water had indeed broken and that since she was nearly 37 weeks but not really going into labor they wanted to induce. So that's what happened, there was a fairly awkward moment when the nurse asked if I was going to stay with her. Since neither of us had planned for me to be there she didn't know if I wanted to be there and I didn't know if she wanted me to be there. We got over it quickly though when we looked at each other and knew that I would be staying. And so began her 12 hour or so labor ( I can't remember how long it was, but it seemed to take forever, poor thing).

Part of my duties was to talk to her mom and husband (who was able to call through out) each in turn, and keep them updated. Encourage her to rest while she was able and to get ice chips. We got a good laugh when one of the nurses thought it was me in labor getting my own ice chips.

I had never experience a hospital birth, but I got a front row seat with that one. And while I couldn't recommend a hospital birth based on that experience (so impersonal) I was very honored to be there, I even got to cut the cord for this little bundle.
One year later...We'd stayed in touch, though we both moved when our husband's were killed in the same helicopter crash. I was even able to fly out to visit them for the 1st birthday.Hard to believe it's now been over four years!

Brown Noser In Pink Leather Slippers

Providence loved her dance class and her teacher, perhaps a little too much. The whole class was sprinkled...actually more like bathed...with "look what I can do." She made sure she was by Miss Alexis' side as much as possible so she could gaze up at her adoringly, and with only three kids total in the class she didn't have much competition. She learned First Position and a few other things who's terms I have already forgotten. Unfortunately Providence was leader this class which meant she would claim her rightful place as first in everything while the other two gracefully made way for her. I fear she'll have a rude awakening next week when she will have to be one to follow, so we'll have lots to work on in the next week, most of which have to do with class etiquette.

I'll Dance To That

Providence starts dance class this week at a small studio nearby thanks to Gram and Grandpa Jim (it was their birthday present to her) she'll be in the Tiny Toes class. We went to an open house on Saturday and met her teacher who is pregnant and really nice. With all these belly's around Providence it's no wonder she wants a sibling so bad. She actually suggested awhile back that we go to the movie theater to see if there were any boys that wanted to marry me. Ha! I explained that we don't man-hunt especially at the movie theater on a Sunday morning.

At least her grand plans can make me laugh now instead of wanting to burst into tears.

Yesterday I was asked how old I am, and I didn't know. I was able to answer eventually because I remembered the year I was born, but I'm still trying to figure out what that means.

Green For Green

I like recycling, I like composting, I like bagging my groceries with the mis-matched cloth bags I carry around (and the few cents I save). My main household cleaner? Vinegar. I love the smell of clothes fresh off the line. I don't litter and in fact will from time to time clean up other peoples litter. I am a big supporter of breastfeeding, home births, cloth diapers, and baby wearing. I prefer to be natural in pretty much every aspect from using garlic to draw out infections, to applying oils instead of lotions, to my pine cat litter. A few years ago these things earned me a label of hippie from some friends (ok the lack of bra, and infrequent showers may have played a part) so when the the cutely coined phrase "green" came out I was happy to shed my hippieness which gave some dreadlocked, patchouli scented, grass smoking, bell-bottom wearing connotations which were not really me, in exchange for it.

Now it's so hip to Go Green, Be Green, Green Living. Good grief people. How different are you living? Is recycling and cloth bags really that new of a concept? It seems as though a volcano has erupted and the lava spewing forth is some kind of green muck. Don't get me wrong I'm glad to see others enjoying some of these things that I have been for most of my life, but now I don't want to be stuck with this label either, the connotations are even worse. Because you see, I like to eat meat, I wear leather shoes, I don't buy into the global warming propaganda and get sick of hearing about it, nor do I believe that the world is over-populated.

So if I don't think I am saving our planet one cloth bag at a time, but I still want to be a wise and faithful steward of the area's I have dominion over what does that make me?

Perhaps I'll go back to being called a hippie, I kind of like dreadlocks now.

Tried And True

As Providence was taking care of her dolly tonight it got me reminiscing about time spent with her. Baby is a treasured hand me down from Auntie, and she's seen her share of life with Providence, in fact she's been around so long her name has never been more then "baby." The wild and crazy hair adorning her head fits right with my wild and crazy young'un, who has pretty wild hair herself. And even though for Providence's 2nd birthday a dear family friend made baby a number of outfits, she's more often naked as a jay bird...hmmm, another thing they have in common.

When You Take Something To Bed

You usually don't want sharp corners but Providence was so cute when she said she wanted to sleep with her daddy, I let her.

We are beginning school this week which includes me making list's and schedules, they look fantastic on paper but transferring it to daily life will be a challenge. Reminder to self: flexibility is good, and you cannot be flexible without having plans.

Also I have been taking Mary Scot out on bike rides, they've been fairly short but she LOVES to run, I like it too though Providence is kind of outgrowing her bike seat behind me. If I really get down to peddling I have to say over and over "move those legs." We also learned that swaying side to side in a bike seat is not nearly as safe as in a car seat.

Those Overflowing Cups

My surprise of the day yesterday was a new lawn mower arriving.

Stand back grass, you will over-grow no longer!

And one more surprise I did my own blog make-over, I changed colors and made the header with no support. I am so proud! I'm not quite ready to write my own codes but tweaking already written ones opens a whole new world! Good for me, pat on the back.